This Is The Hard Bit

I’m gonna let you have a wee insight into my average evening.

I took this audio as a “voice memo” with my iPhone from the bottom of the stairs.

I warn you, it’s LOUD, and it’s really hard to listen to.

Screamy Max (might want to right click to get this to open in another window)

So yeah, when I say Max is being screamy on twitter (and if you follow me there, that’ll be a regular update from me), that is what I mean.

I don’t know why he does it.

He doesn’t seem to be able to wind down for bedtime.

If I leave a wee light on, he’ll stay up till all hours of the night, and Zack will too.

If I let him cry it out (*shudders*), he’ll fall asleep in a couple of hours, tops.

So that’s what I have to do.

If I go to try to calm it down, it does work eventually, but as soon as I go back out of the room, he starts up again like that straight away, so it just extends the time spent screaming.

There are never any real tears with this either.

Just pure rage.

So when you moan about your kid being annoying and not wanting to sleep, have a listen to that, and be greatful that you don’t have to put up with this 4-5 evenings of every week, cause frankly, it sucks.

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  1. February 12, 2011 / 12:24 am

    It’s awful. We have a very similar situation, but for different reasons, and I find it unbearable. Nothing brings me as close to losing it…even on “good” nights, e will wake up and howl for hours.

    So ((hugs)),
    Sleepless in Stirling

  2. February 12, 2011 / 1:07 am

    Sounds like mine. Amy has been doing that this week. Isaac hasn’t been too bad for bedtime, but he generally does that during dinner prep. Ugh. Loads of sympathy, cos I’m living it too. And no, people don’t get it until they’ve heard it/seen it.

  3. February 12, 2011 / 5:55 am

    Masses of sympathy and empathy from here too.

    Annie lies in bed and kicks the wall, which wakes her sister and then the screaming starts all round.

    Thank god for iPods, we got Annie the cheapest one we could for her 6th birthday, we put a story on it I found a childrens toy shop, it is a audio book that contains subtle relaxation/hypnotic cues that help you drift off to sleep. The story was a total bust and caused even worse tantrums. So we erased it from the iPod, loaded it up with Annie’s fav. songs and she falls asleep listening to it.

    For Heidi’s recent birthday she also got the same model iPod and has been falling asleep listening to the Muppet Show. Although Daddy added some new songs a couple of nights ago and she woke me at 4am to inform me her music was different 🙁

  4. February 12, 2011 / 6:19 am

    Oh Marilyn, firstly….your voice and accent are to die for! Just Beautiful!!!
    But onto the screaming….I actually started crying when I heard this.
    It triggered a lot of memories…my Harley did that from the day he was born until he was almost 4 years old EVERY.FREAKING.NIGHT!!

    And we now have had to sadly medicate him with heavy sleeping pills now just so the rest of us can get some shut-eye. *sigh*

    Paying th it doesn’t go on tha long for you guys

    Sending hugs {{{}}}..

  5. February 12, 2011 / 6:40 am

    I am so so glad that I didn’t have to deal with this as I would have lost my reason. The autie families that we both know on Facebook would have lots of ideas and advice on this if that is any help. And mind yourself, it must be very difficult xx

  6. February 12, 2011 / 9:05 am

    Sounds sooooo much like our house every night! Hate, hate, hate bedtimes in our house and then 4-5 times a week J will wake up at least twice during the night urgh! Unfortunately we can’t leave him to scream it out because he just gets louder and then more aggressive. We’ve tried everything but sleeping pills so sorry but I have no wise words just a big hug, hang in there ((xx))

  7. February 12, 2011 / 9:14 am

    Hi sweety just popped over to tell you I listened. 🙂

  8. February 12, 2011 / 9:17 am

    I feel for you, I really do. Obviously Jerry isn’t Autistic but without fail every night he will get up & do this. This morning it was 4am. The other night midnight, it’s draining. I often don’t get back to sleep, nor nap in the day. It’s so difficult & they wake the other sleeping children. 🙁

  9. February 12, 2011 / 1:06 pm

    I swear, it’s times like those when Twitter and my internet/bloggy buddies keep me sane! *hugs* hopefully we’ll get to meet sometime. I’m only up the road in Crieff after all! xx

  10. February 12, 2011 / 1:07 pm

    Yeah. I find it hard to listen to that clip, and it’s only just under 2 minutes. That for 2-3 hours is REALLY draining. >_<
    *hugs* at least we know and get it, eh? x

  11. February 12, 2011 / 1:10 pm

    Ah, hope you woke Daddy so that he would know not to do it again!
    Max loves his ipod, but he’ll just stay up for hours with it, rather than fall asleep, and then cries when it eventually runs out of battery. Plus he has a thing about anything/one going near his ears, so headphones are out. >_<
    Hopefully when he’s a bit older eh!
    *hugs* xx

  12. February 12, 2011 / 1:12 pm

    I’m taking the recording with me on monday when he has the last of a string of assessments for the “official” diagnosis. Hoping someone will be able to prescribe Max with something, as it’s just getting really too disruptive, for Zack, me and for him when he’s got nursery the next day.
    Also, LOL that you love my voice – that was me with a croaky one as I was tired and I have a chest infection. 😛
    *hugs* right back at ya xxx

  13. February 12, 2011 / 1:13 pm

    Yeah, I’ll post it in the IAA page and see if anyone has any ideas. I do, I make sure I take time for me whenever I can. These people who live in my computer are really useful and comforting at times like these! 😉 xx

  14. February 12, 2011 / 1:16 pm

    I think I’m gonna have to try the sleeping pills. I’m finding it very exhausting. All I want to do is sleep and he is sometimes up for hours! >_<

  15. February 12, 2011 / 1:17 pm

    The amazing thing is, if Zack is already asleep when it starts, he rarely wakes up – yet they are in the same room! It’s just so not fair on Zack though. Or any of us really. I’m taking the audio clip to the Dr’s on monday and will see what we can do from there I think. *hugs* hope you manage a wee snooze during the day! xxx

  16. February 12, 2011 / 1:18 pm

    It is, but then writing it out like this, it really helps. And regardless of the time of night, there are always some of my twitter/bloggy buddies about to chat to and distract me. 🙂 *hugs* x

  17. February 12, 2011 / 5:23 pm

    Crikey Marylin. I don’t know what to say. That must be so incredibly hard for you.


  18. February 12, 2011 / 5:31 pm

    I won’t lie, it’s the hardest bit. But it’s not *always* like that, there are good bits too! xx

  19. February 12, 2011 / 6:09 pm

    My first boyfriend’s little sister had autism. There was a lot of screaming, and I think she found me weird for a couple of weeks, but she was a lovely kid.
    As used to it as I am from spending time with my ex, and school, I couldn’t imagine living with it. *hugs*

  20. February 12, 2011 / 6:31 pm

    Well, I guess I never imagined I’d live with it either, but I just have to get on with it! Thank goodness for the internet to keep me company and stop me going even more insane. 😉

  21. February 12, 2011 / 6:56 pm

    Stupidly I was shocked that you have a Scottish accent! #fail!
    Aww hun *hugs* I wish I had something to suggest or some “always works” method or something. Hang in there sweety.

  22. February 12, 2011 / 11:20 pm

    Well, thanks to the wonder of the internet, I have a lot of friends now who have been in my shoes, and they all recommend trying him with melatonin, so gonna speak to the doctor about it on Monday, hopefully that’ll help!
    LOL at you forgetting I’m Scottish. Soft *thistle* remember? 😛 x

  23. February 13, 2011 / 2:10 am

    Jesus H Christ that is bad. It must be dreadful for you when it happens. And poor Zack too. Sending a hug and warm thoughts north of the border x

  24. February 13, 2011 / 5:18 am

    We got a little barbie pillow for Annie that has a speaker in it and you just attached the ipod. Works a treat and is not real loud. Heidi loves the big headphones that totally enclose her ears so that was easy.

    And yes Daddy got up and solved the iPod issue. 😀

  25. February 13, 2011 / 6:48 am

    Oh hun that would be so hard I can’t imagine. {{{hugs}}}
    Graviee was a bugger to get to sleep for the first few years. If we put her in her own cot or bed she would wake as soon as we left the room. We gave up and just had her sleep with us. It was the only way we could get any sleep too.

  26. February 13, 2011 / 1:18 pm

    hmm, might have a try with a speaker pillow… if it doesn’t end up working for Max, it might for me! 😉

  27. February 13, 2011 / 1:19 pm

    Yeah, Zack ends up sleeping in my bed most nights, and I just kind of rock back and forth while on twitter for company… 😉 (that rocking bit is a joke, honest!!). Thanks for the hugs. 🙂 x

  28. February 13, 2011 / 1:20 pm

    I’ve tried that, but if I stay with Max, or try to bring him into bed with me, he just thinks that means it’s play time. >_<
    Hopefully will get something from the doc tomorrow that can help! x

  29. February 13, 2011 / 1:54 pm

    Oh my love, that really puts my 2nd olds tantrums into perspective x

  30. February 13, 2011 / 2:22 pm

    Indeed. Hoping to get something to help him wind down to sleep this week. Enough is enough! >_<

  31. February 13, 2011 / 3:59 pm

    Oh Marylin, that must be so awful to listen to every night. I’m sorry. No wise words, just loads of sympathy. xoxo

  32. February 13, 2011 / 5:14 pm

    It is, but I’ve got some fantastic advice from some lovely people, so going to speak to his doc about it tomorrow. xxx

  33. February 14, 2011 / 8:08 pm

    I read and listened to this after your tweet tonight. I now understand the significance in that tweet. I admire you so much Mrs

  34. February 14, 2011 / 9:01 pm

    Thanks sweety. Tonight is our first night without this in about 4/5 months. It’s blissful! x

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