Never shower the kid again. Ever.

Is it bedtime yet...?
 

This is me right now.

Well actually, I took that last night before putting the boys to bed, but it’s also me now.

See, I decided yesterday evening that it would be much quicker and easier to give Max a shower instead of a bath.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Well he wasn’t happy about it at all, but it only took 3 minutes. I was soaked through by this point, and he was as clean as he was going to get, so yeah, 3 minutes, in, washed, hair, out, dried.

Commence about 20 minutes of being Very Upset at me for putting him through the HELL THAT IS SHOWERING.

Bathing has become a lot easier over the last few months. He doesn’t particularly enjoy it, but he’ll let me get on with it, play with the bubble and his toys while grumbling a wee bit, and then once he’s out he just goes back to what he was doing before. Happy and clean.

I should have known the 20 minutes of being upset was just a precursor for what was to come.

But I was naive.

I didn’t think.

So off my boys went to bed, both fell asleep. Hell I even managed to get to bed before midnight!

I must have *just* dropped off when I was woken at 1am. “I want change nappy”.

Ugh.

OK.

*changes nappy*

You good?

*thumbs up*

Good.

Night night!

“Eee you ater!”

Of course I’d had the equivalent of a power nap by this point, so I ended up WIDE AWAKE till after 3am.

Just dropped off when

“I want xbox please!!” while climbing onto my bladder and crash landing there.

By this point I was so desperate for sleep I just agreed. It was nearly 4am. I could totally do this.

Downstairs, xbox on.

We good? Good. Awesome. ‘Ee you ater!

Back to bed.

I check facebook and such because, you know, I can.

I had literally just put my phone away and turned round, getting comfortable.

“I want milk please!!!”

I wanted to cry.

Downstairs, milk got, cereal too, nappy checked, xbox on, computer on, heater on, good? Good! good. ‘Ee you ater! Back upstairs, into bed. Passed out.

One hour later.

I want change nappy.

It was at this point I decided not to bother going back upstairs until he was fast asleep.

Which was about 8am this morning.

All this because I gave him a shower instead of a bath.

And now I’m a zombie.

 


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10 responses to “Never shower the kid again. Ever.”

  1. Croila avatar

    Oh Marylin! Oh crumbs! What an ordeal … And how vividly you’ve written this. I was THERE.
    And I really didn’t want to be.

    You poor thing! 🙁

    1. Marylin avatar
      Marylin

      I really don’t know how on earth I managed to deal with this every single day last year. No wonder I had a breakdown!! So yeah, no more showers. EVER!! 😉

  2. Altijd-Lente avatar
    Altijd-Lente

    Hi there, Marilyn!
    What a beautiful post. So sad to see you lying there on the floor though….. I do hope you have recovered and are feeling a bit better!

    I do not have kids, but other overwhelming stuff to keep me busy, so right now I do feel just like you…

    Thank your for sharing!

    1. Marylin avatar
      Marylin

      Thank you Altijd! I am just so tired today! It’s exhausting at times, isn’t it? Life that is. Whoever decided to tell us about that elusive “balance” just wanted to rub it in. 😉 Thank you for visiting!

  3. Bright Side of Life avatar

    Oh shame, you poor thing. I so hear you about the shower thing as have the same issue in my house! Baths rule! 🙂

    1. Marylin avatar
      Marylin

      You know when you think that you shouldn’t do something but you do it anyway? Yeah, that was definitely me with the shower last night! >_< He's been a cheeky lil monkey all day. He WILL sleep tonight and even if he doesn't, he's still going to school!!

  4. Kristin Delaney avatar

    Oh, Marilyn – I’m impressed you are alert enough to tell the tale. One extra wake up with my little one and I’m wrecked, let alone a night full of adventure. Well done.

    1. Marylin avatar
      Marylin

      Thanks Kristin! I don’t quite know how I got through today. Finally managed to properly wake up around 3pm. Phew! This used to be a daily (nightly?) occurrence until we were finally assigned a wonderful sleep counselor at the start of the year. I genuinely don’t know how I managed to cope with it every day last year! Thank goodness this is just a blip. 🙂

  5. Emma Day (crazywithtwins) avatar

    Haha this made me laugh, I’m sorry! I’m a mean mummy, when mine do that, I send them straight back to bed in tears with a resounding “NO”. xx

    1. Marylin avatar
      Marylin

      Oh I do the same with Zack! Unfortunately with Max, it just doesn’t work that way. The joys of autism. 😉 xx

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