When your friends know you better than you do…

When your friends know you better than you do…

good in every day

A friend asked me today what was wrong.

Nothing? I replied.

Nothing I’ve been hugely aware of anyway…

Funny how our friends can sometimes see through the veneer we don’t even realise we’re putting on.

I can’t really put my finger on it.

Maybe it was some comments made (jokingly) about my weight at the weekend, or maybe it’s the pressure I’ve been putting on myself to be better, to learn more, to write more.

Maybe it’s just that it’s that time of the month.

Either way, I suppose I have been a bit off kilter the last week.

Piling on the should’s and must’s – even when I know that never works well for me.

Feeling constantly exhausted, dishes and laundry piling up… ok honestly, the place is a tip. *sigh*

I guess that’s the thing about depression.

You can be doing great for weeks, months even, and then for no particular reason, you to end up feeling exhausted and lacking motivation for anything.

And, well, I feel that this is something I want to be open about.

Not everything is happy and awesome all the time.

It’s swings and roundabouts, isn’t it?

Cycles and rhythm.

There are good days, and there are bad days.

I’m going to disconnect for the weekend (as much as I can without withdrawals that is!) and try to just relax, have some fun with my boys, maybe take them for a long walk with the dog, and get myself back on track. Whatever that track may be.

Looking for the good bits that are in every day.

What do you do when life seems to lose it’s shine? Let me know in the comments… ❤

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8 Comments

  1. October 2, 2015 / 7:35 pm

    I know these feels – though, without friends pointing them out for me. But things seem alright and then just all of a sudden…it’s not. Nothing had to happen to make it so, it can just be a feeling of "off" that creeps up on you and then it’s "really off" and nothing seems good any more.
    While it’s not a solution, I try and disconnect. Crummy days are spent watching movies or cartoons, with tea and snacks. While not necessarily mood improving, it normally doesn’t make me feel any worse at least! Also, if you can muster, get in the kitchen and make something delicious. I’ve done that twice in the past two weeks when I wasn’t feeling up to snuff. It was something to do that I don’t normally (baking, that is), and when it was done I had something delicious to munch on! 🙂

    • October 2, 2015 / 9:17 pm

      Disconnecting is the aim for the weekend, not necessarily by not going online, but disconnecting from any "should’s". 🙂
      My kitchen was an awful mess (I managed to rectify that today) so I didn’t even want to make anything.
      I like your thinking though! Might do some baking this weekend… thanks Jessica! <3

  2. Ana
    October 3, 2015 / 8:03 am

    I can definitely relate. For the last 6 months I feel like I’ve had my depression under "control" and that everything is on track…then when you least expect my mood takes a dive and I’m well off track. It can take a few days to get back on track but it does help finding that little "something good" in the blue days. Enjoy your weekend being offline.

    • October 4, 2015 / 7:01 pm

      It’s been a good weekend thanks Ana, and you’re so right – it’s always when you least expect it, isn’t it?

  3. Mrs TeePot
    October 4, 2015 / 6:00 pm

    hugs hope you’ve enjoyed the weekend and are feeling a bit perkier now.
    For me, when I feel down, it’s all about self-care, whatever form that takes. Sometimes it’s just letting myself feel bad for a bit, sometimes it’s dragging myself into the shower, sometimes it’s taking that several week old nail varnish off, you get the idea.

    • October 4, 2015 / 7:02 pm

      Simple things like remembering to brush my teeth and getting a decent night’s sleep can become so hard, can’t they?

      Feeling better and ready to get back to it tomorrow after a weekend off! 🙂

  4. Kwame Whyte
    October 8, 2015 / 12:51 pm

    I’ve had a lot of these days lately as well. It’s hard to snap myself out of it because I’m so focused on finding a solution for the problem that’s stressing me out. Shutting down usually helps me. Watching movies, hanging out my daughter and pets allows me to refocus on something less draining. Long walks help too. I try to focus on nature; observe and take in my surroundings, this helps me let go.

    • October 8, 2015 / 3:24 pm

      Stepping back is what helps me the most too – taking any and all pressure off myself (that I pile on myself!). Long walks… I think I’ll be doing a few of these while my boys visit their dad next week. 🙂
      Thank you Kwame, I hope your good days outweigh the bad ones. xo

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